Lovehoney best sex of your life couple’s sex toy advent calendar
Buy now ?100, Boots.com
Design
The Lovehoney advent calendar is pretty classy considering it’s a large cardboard box full of butt plugs. Classic red and gold colours, good chunky cardboard with satisfying to peel open windows. Although we suspect it’s highly unlikely that you’re going to have this calendar on display for guests when they come for a mulled wine and a mince pie, even if you did then it wouldn’t look out of place. It’s solidly festive.
What’s inside?
There are two types of people in this world – the ones who want to know what’s inside an advent calendar before they buy it, and the ones who don’t. And while the element of surprise is lovely, considering it’s going to set you back ?100, (or ?120 on Lovehoney’s own website) it’s understandable that you might want to know what’s in store.
Often these calendar’s claim to be “worth” a certain amount of money, and the reality of that claim can be a little spurious. But in this case, it’s objectively true and it contains one (fantastic) toy which retails for about the same price as the actual calendar. We’re referring to the full-size Womanizer vibrator, which retails for around ?100 by itself, that can be found behind door 25.
Still, there’s plenty to excite the seasoned sex toy expert in this calendar, and nothing that will terrify a curious, but generally vanilla, person. Other highlights include a jewelled butt plug in a reassuringly bijou size, a larger butt plug for anal devotees, a surprisingly punchy bullet vibrator and a sweet little spanking paddle which is a perfect size to take on a dirty weekend away.
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As is often the case with these calendars, there are some cheaper items to bulk out the 25 days. The pom-pom tickler is unlikely to see any actual bedroom action and the instructional sex dice feel a little bit half hearted, while the sex position cards could all be found for free on the internet.
The ribbon wrist restraints on the other hand, probably only cost about 25p to produce but are pleasantly silky and again would be an easy stow-away to spice up a romantic holiday.
Plenty of effort has been made to include male pleasure, with various male masturbators and cock rings included, which mean it’ll be most useful if your sex life includes a penis. But there’s a solid amount of toys for either genitals, so whatever your orientation there’ll be a decent number of toys to use.
There are also some sweeter, rather than kinkier touches, including a pretty scented candle, massage oil and a massage tool (for your back – rather than anything more intimate). None of it is overtly Christmassy, so you can use all of the products all year around.
Value for money
Given the inclusion of the Womanizer, there’s no question that the calendar isn’t worth the ?100 – ?120 that it’s selling for. If you have a clitoris and you don’t currently own a womanizer (which we’ve raved about before) then this is a no-brainer, you get one of the best sex toys on the market, and a whole lot of other products basically for free.
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It would also be a great way to quickly build up a sort of sex toy capsule collection. The only time it would arguably not be worth the cash is if you’ve already got the womanizer, or if you’re a single man without a vagina. Lovehoney say that it’s worth ?370, and even if that’s a bit generous, it’s certainly worth more than its retail price.
The Verdict: Lovehoney best sex of your life couple’s sex toy advent calendar
There are some bum notes here, but they’re few and far between. We would say that 20/25 of the products inside the Lovehoney calendar are genuinely useful, exciting toys that you’re likely to get use out of for the rest of the year. And unlike a gin or beauty calendar, these aren’t products that you’ll use up (other than the candle and the massage oil). If you take proper care of your sex toys, they’ll last for years.
Aside from the very generous inclusion of the womanizer, buying an adult advent calendar gives you an invaluable added bonus. Opening a raunchy treat each day of advent will almost certainly be an exciting bonding activity with your sexual partner (or with yourself). It’s easy for your sex life to get lost at Christmas amongst obligations, family commitments, drinking too much and being so full that you can’t move. The Lovehoney advent calendar might well ensure that this year you remember to enjoy some festive frolics in between mince pies.